Is it possible I haven't said anything negative in a while? There must be a negativity blitz coming on... Though maybe it's because listening to the leaked tape of Alec Baldwin berating his daughter scared the bejeezus out of me, that I would somehow become him, a whirling dervish of negativity.
today i announced that the students admitted to a certain university certainly test well but apparently cannot think independently. i shouldn't have generalized like this - i'm sure there are a few independent thinkers on campus.
we had a ksa (korean students assoc) meeting here at school to talk about the v. tech shootings on thursday and they asked the three of us who were "professors" to introduce ourselves to everyone. it was prospective student weekend and the room was packed of current students, prospectives and their parents. that's when i took it upon myself to declare all confident like that i was a "visiting professor" and then i cringed internally, mortified at myself. that is decidedly presumptuous since i haven't finished my ph.d. yet, nor have i even opened my dissertation once in the past two weeks to work on it.
yesterday, i was teaching class when the news started coming out about the shooting. i told the kids to stop googling and pay attention to the class. i didn't realize the magnitude of the event and now i feel as though i acted like a cranky belligerent teacher. i think we'll discuss it in class tomorrow. especially considering that a korean kid was the shooter. what will this do for koreans living in the south. will we be vilified and racially profiled as criminals now?
it's hard not to be negative when it's been snowing for two days... in mid-april. all i want to do is walk around saying shut up, fuck you bitch! all day long.
sometimes you hit a lull in a conversation where you fill it with empty meaningless gossip. i did this when i was having coffee with c. and said i heard that s. was jealous of all the job interviews i got and how i thought she was a competitive bitch because of it. what a totally arrogant jackass i am.
h. wrote me the other day that she loves the subaru hatchback, a car which i wholeheartedly revile. i responded with "you have horrible taste in cars!" i think she did not take this comment well, in the same way that she did not speak to me after i told her i thought "destiny's child" sucked. i haven't heard from h. in days. i shouldn't tell people what is or is not good taste. this is a subjective thing, no? clearly still much to learn.
